We love you. And your dough balls. The ones you can have as a starter and then again with chocolate as a dessert. We love your pizzas, especially the Diavolo. We love the fact that you donate 5p from every Veneziana pizza to the Venice in Peril Fund.
We don’t love jazz, obviously, but love the fact that you have live musicians in your trendier branches.
We love the fact you don’t sell stuffed crust pizzas. Or chicken tikka masala ones. Because you’re too classy for that.
We aren’t against change. We love the new meatball bolognese pizza. And the new ones with the holes in the middle. We even like the new black and white stripes that you have going on. Very smart, very now.
But Peter. We need to talk. It’s not us, it’s you.
There’s no one else in our lives. Nando’s or GBK cannot replace you. But you have changed. And it’s undermining our relationship. You have changed your lighting.
For 47 years, you had narrow-beam accent lighting cast into the middle of the table from projectors with honeycomb filters. It was your look. It was iconic. Lighting professionals held it up as an example of ‘branding with light’.
Now look at you. With your decorative pendants that scream mid-life crisis. And your vertical illumination (*sobs*).
We can fix this, Peter. So come back to us and bring back the old lighting, and the old Peter.